When I saw the original copy of, “Life Code; The New Rules For Winning In The Real World,” written by Phil McGraw (AKA television show host Dr. Phil), I felt that perhaps I could benefit from what it had to offer. I think I felt particularly drawn to this book given the events that have taken place in my own life. Not really being an avid follower of Dr. Phil’s show, but having read other material written by him, I felt certain that I might get something out of this latest publication of his given the common sense approach he’s demonstrated in his previous works. Continue reading Introduction: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Are you wondering how it is that other people in the world with half your talents are moving ahead; achieving promotions, pay raises, and the credit that really belongs to you? Do you wonder how come other people, sometimes even your own siblings, get the totally hot popular dates while you’re left standing on the sidelines? Do you not understand how it is that people manage to take your money, possessions, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife away from you and constantly seem to come out on top? Do you want to stop the liars, cheaters, manipulators, emotional and physical abusers from bypassing, robbing or hurting you and the ones you love? Continue reading Chapter 1A: Life Is A Game; Be A Player Or Get Played: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Dr. Phil tells us here that he personally believes that there really isn’t such a thing as bad luck. It really doesn’t mean you are unlucky if you attract partners in your life who continually cheat on you. It simply means that you are, either consciously or unconsciously, choosing to place your trust in lovers who should not be trusted to remain faithful to you. Continue reading Chapter 1B: Accidents, Bad Luck And The BAITER Acronym: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Mr. McGraw tells us here that a Baiter is one who will generally do something intentionally which causes you pain, harm or to put you at risk in some other way. This may seem a little confusing at first when seen in the original text. However, the inference here is pretty clear when you pause to remember that a Baiter cares pretty much only about what they want or feel they need, with disregard for the morality (or lack thereof) in their actions. Continue reading Chapter 1C: Being Played By A Player: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Dr. Phil starts out this chapter in his book by telling us that the worst kinds of Baiters (ones who can rape and murder without any kind of remorse) are out there. True! Although they are quite screwed up they are thankfully not likely to ever enter into our lives; at least for the majority of us. Continue reading Chapter 2A: Who Are These People: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Enter Teresa; the wife of a local business man that Dr. Phil knew. She certainly seemed, to Mr. McGraw, to be more than qualified to do the job which he needed performed. So he added this mother of five children, some of which had been in trouble with the law, to his team of clinicians, nurses and doctors. Continue reading Chapter 2B: A Real Mother Teresa: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Before we get into the common identifiers that will help us to spot Baiters who are coming our way; Dr. Phil suggests that we write down all of the people we routinely interact with in all areas of our life. He suggests that we do this intuitive exercise, first. This way we get a feel for what our gut tells us about the folks we deal with from day to day in our lives. Continue reading Chapter 2C: Evil 8 List: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
As we move right along here; it is advised by Mr. McGraw that you trust yourself first! Giving people the benefit of the doubt blindly is just not something that really makes sense in this day and age. Dr. Phil suggests instead that we keep an open mind when we meet new people and simply gather data that confirms for us one way or another that the person can be fully trusted, trusted with only some things or, “Not trusted at all!” Continue reading Chapter 2D: Blind Trust And Situational Awareness: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
In this part of Mr. McGraw’s book; we are given the fifteen most common tactics that Baiters use to gain our confidence and access to our lives. Mr. McGraw does acknowledge that sometimes genuinely honest folks might use one of these tactics, too, with innocent intentions. So sometimes, in order to determine whether or not the tactic we recognize is being used by an honest person or a Baiter, we might find ourselves having to gather additional data. Continue reading Chapter 3A: The Bad Guys; Baiter’s Secret Playbook: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
What are the fifteen most common tactics (The Nefarious 15) we should be aware of that Baiters will use to take advantage of us in a multitude of ways? That’s what you want to know, right? Well, “Alrighty then!” Let’s get started! Continue reading Chapter 3B: Tactics 1-5 Of The Nefarious 15 Explained: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Tactic 6: Nothing is ever a Baiter’s fault! If a Baiter gets caught doing something wrong; they will either attempt to justify their actions in a way in which they complement themselves, or they will blame something/someone else for their wrong doing. No relationship problems are one-hundred percent one person’s fault. However, Dr. Phil tells us here, Baiters take responsibility for nothing. They deflect blame of any kind and attempt to make it appear that they are taking responsibility for their actions in a situation. Sadly enough though the key word here is, “Appear!” They are Master Manipulators and they are very good at putting on a show, for sure. In dealing with a Baiter; when things go south it will be your fault and not theirs. Continue reading Chapter 3C: Tactics 6-10 Of The Nefarious 15 Explained: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Tactic 11: Baiters will identify your Hot Buttons and Sensitivities to gain control over you! Hey! Let’s face it! We all have buttons that when pressed will cause us to behave in certain ways. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing in the usual scheme of things. However, once a Baiter has found those insecurities we all possess, or, those topics that are most likely to set us off, “The emotional extortion begins!” Continue reading Chapter 3D: Tactics 11-15 Of The Nefarious 15 explained: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Dr. Phil suggests that if you are still having difficulty discerning the difference between a Baiter and a Non-Baiter you can simply compare a person’s actions to those of someone you would consider to be a true friend. If someone is doing something to you that you know a true friend would not do to you, or even for you, “You’ve got your answer!” Continue reading Chapter 3E: A Message For The Real World Bad Guys Plus An Exercise To Help Spot And Defeat Them: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Now that we’ve gotten through all of the dark stuff found in the first three chapters of Dr. Phil McGraw’s, “Life Code,” we can now turn the corner into more positive territory. “How’s that,” you ask? Well… It kind of goes on like this! Continue reading Chapter 4A: Stop Being A Target: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
When it comes to what we want in life; a lot of the time we are disappointed in the things that happen because of our expectations more than anything else. That is why Dr. Phil talks here about making sure that our expectations are in line with reality. Continue reading Chapter 4B: Realistic Steps To Achieving Goals Winners Use: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Did you know that the outcome of most court cases is determined before any party ever sets one foot in a courtroom? Did you know that the same reason also applies to your success or failure in achieving a goal? Continue reading Chapter 5A: Your New Life Code Playbook: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
If you are getting the impression that, “The one who does the most research and preparation work in life wins,” you’d be on the right track! From what Phil writes in this chapter of Life Code; it certainly seems to hold true in the courtroom, at the very least! So why couldn’t it work in achieving goals in all other areas of our lives? Continue reading Chapter 5B: Rules 1-7 Of The Sweet 16: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Need some help with coming up with a good plan for attaining your goal? Well, you’re in luck! Philip McGraw has given us seven points that should be covered in order to achieve our goals successfully. Continue reading Chapter 5C: The 7 Steps To Achieve A Goal Successfully: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Step 8: Keep the particulars to yourself! Philip tells us that, because of the competition that we face in just about every aspect of our lives, we should be discrete about the things we are doing, or, are planning to do. Sometimes you just don’t want to say anything to anyone unless you trust someone one-hundred percent. He reminds us of the old saying, “Predictability breeds contempt,” and that maintaining a certain amount of mystery is to our advantage. This is because it makes people come to us in order to find out what we’re thinking. If we are predictable people wouldn’t need to know our thoughts. They’d have plenty of history to go on in order to determine what our next moves are going to be. Also, if people don’t know about what we’re thinking or even planning they can’t get in our way. Continue reading Chapter 5D: Rules 8-12 Of The Sweet 16: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Step 13:You need to create a group of supporters to stand behind you as you move towards achieving your goals! Dr. McGraw tells us here that winners are not, “Lone Wolves,” and do need other people to support them in order to be successful. Of course, he points out, too, that in order to get people behind you as you embark on your journey towards success; you need to answer the question they will be undoubtedly asking, “What’s in it for me!” Most people, probably even you, won’t get involved in anything unless they are getting something out of it. It’s just human nature! So, if you want people to support you it would be in your best interests to advocate for them, helping them with their goals, etcetera. After all, “Life is a game of give and take,” right? Continue reading Chapter 5E: Rules 13-16 Of The Sweet 16: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Right off the mark; Dr. Phil McGraw lets us know in this chapter of, “Life Code,” that life is a negotiation. Everything we do in life that involves other people in our family, circle of friends, at work or elsewhere is a negotiation of some sort. His basic message is simply this. “If you aren’t comfortable with negotiation and aren’t getting what you want out of life you need to get over it right now!” He gives us some pointers to follow in our negotiations in this chapter, too, and they are coming right up! Continue reading Chapter 6A: Taking The Mystery Out Of Negotiation And Negotiating The None-Negotiable: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Are there things in life that are non-negotiable? Hell yes! There are people that just cannot be negotiated with, either. This is simply because they only seek to dominate, control, and take from others. Philip tells us here that we don’t have to negotiate with people like that at any time in our lives. Continue reading Chapter 6B: Deal And Deal Breakers More Deeply Defined: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Dr. Philip McGraw tells us here that the stuff he’s shared in his book, “Life Code,” is worth teaching our children at an age appropriate level. He’s not trying to tell us that we should teach our children to be paranoid though. However, Dr. Phil does point out that our kids are not growing up in the same world we live in. Continue reading Chapter 7A: Parenting In The Real World: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Phil asks us how well we know the people we are turning the care of our children over to. He runs off a list of folks we might be entrusting the wellbeing of our kids to, which includes more than just school teachers and the babysitter. Dr. Phil lists athletics coaches and religious leaders as potential people we might be leaving our children alone with; asking how well we have checked all of these people out. Are they setting off alarm bells in our gut? Even if they aren’t; are we sure they really are who we believe them to be? Continue reading Chapter 7B: Protecting Children From Abuse In Our Local Communities: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Anyhow, Phil just doesn’t want us to teach our children about the evil dregs of the earth. He’s not just concerned with them knowing how to avoid predators and protect themselves. McGraw tells us to teach them how to live a positive, full and happy life. This includes, of course, teaching children what we know about how to win in the real world so that they too can succeed. Continue reading Chapter 7C: When Teaching Children How To Win In The World Today: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Dr. Phil tells us that children learn predominantly from the example set by the same sex parent. So, setting the right example for your son if you’re a dad and daughter if you’re a mom is important. Continue reading Chapter 7D: How To Break Patterns Of Abuse: Dr. Phil’s Life Code Book Chapter Summary.
Dr. Phil tells us right here in the final words of his original work, “Life Code; The New Rules for Winning in the Real World,” just one more little thing that comes in the form of a very short sentence. “Now we know!” And, after having written this particular book summary, I can honestly say, “Yes I do know!” “Cheers!”